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[airshow]

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[pobrecisco]

That was absolutely an invitation!

[ He's throwing another, and another. ]

[airshow]

You dick!

[ He's scramble-crabwalking backwards, cheapo dollar store toys popping out of nowhere like he's a human pinata. ]

[pobrecisco]

[ Cisco's laughing like this is the best goddamn day of his life. ]

Ohhh my god, dude, is this a Porter power? You don't just do this at home, right?

[airshow]

Yes, it's a Porter power! I'm not actually a superhuman! Except in the sack.

[pobrecisco]

Ew, dude, I don't wanna hear that. Did I come in here bragging about my sex life?

[airshow]

Like you have a sex life.

[pobrecisco]

[ Okay, that's admittedly true at the moment, but it's not like James needs to know that. ]

Dude, the first thing I did after getting home was go over to my boyfriend's place.

[ And they spent the night eating fast food and watching movies, but again: need to know. ]

[airshow]

Okay, now it's my turn to say eeeew all immaturely. You bully.

[ He throws another ball at Cisco before digging into that zebra cake. ]

Mmmmf mmwhmm mmwphwa?

[pobrecisco]

[ Cisco gathers up his Trickster Bullying Prizes to inspect his haul of stupid cheap toys. ]

Chew, swallow, then talk.

[airshow]

[ He washes it down with the rest of the slurpee. Gross. ]

You're not my mom.

[pobrecisco]

Yeah, thankfully. But what were you saying?

[airshow]

Nothin'. Just last I heard you were trying and failing to date a bird.

[pobrecisco]

I wasn't failing, Kendra and I dated and broke up. It happens!

[airshow]

Well, that sure ain't success, pal!

[pobrecisco]

[ He opens the capsule that has the little sticky hand in it and whips it out so it smacks James in the face. ]

Yeah, well, speaking of failure, how'd talking to Hartley go?

[airshow]

Ow! Always with the abuse!

[ This whiny butthead. ]

I'm gonna guess you already know the answer to that.

[pobrecisco]

Always with the you deserving it!

So what happened? I told him you were serious, but he wouldn't give me a straight answer on what he thought of that.

[airshow]

[ Oh. OH, WHAT. James sits up very straight, wide-eyed and glaring. ]

You what?

[pobrecisco]

[ Dryly: ] I told him you want to marry him and adopt 2.5 kids and a dog and do the whole white picket fence thing.

[airshow]

[ NARROWS

EYES

And in his best opinionated nerd voice: ] How heteronormative.

No way you told him that, 'cause he would've died laughing, so what'd you actually say? Spill.

[pobrecisco]

I told him you like him, okay? I'm pretty sure he didn't believe me.

[ He considers telling James about the picture he sent him, but decides against it. ]

[airshow]

What is this, middle school?

[ And this might be the first time Cisco's seen him Actually Angry, instead of his usual half-joking immature sulking. ]

You don't know anything about it, or him, or me, or anything. You can't just wheedle that kind of info out of a guy and then go behind his back with it because you want him off your couch!

[pobrecisco]

[ Okay, that's actually kind of startling. Cisco's immediately on the defensive, sitting up and getting his feet under him under the ball pit. He immediately realizes that James is right, he doesn't actually know much about him. Other than that he was a supervillain. ]

I was just trying to help.

[airshow]

[ The severity of the situation is somewhat dulled, admittedly, by the slurpee and the zebra cake and the ball pit, but his eyes say you done goofed. ]

You let me make an ass out of myself! More than usual!

[pobrecisco]

[ The ridiculousness of their surroundings is the only reason Cisco isn't a whole lot more worried right now. Some part of him is wondering if he should be thinking about calling Barry or M for a quick getaway, though. ]

Hey, if you made an ass out of yourself, that's not my fault. He asked why you were moping all over my couch, so I told him!